Federal Bytes

They're in our sights

As part of its Customer Focus Week the General Services Administration's Federal Telecommunications Service issued lapel pins to employees in commemoration of the event. Unfortunately the pins bear an uncanny resemblance to a target one might use for archery.

As part of the events FTS sent employees out to customer field sites wearing the pins. We're a little worried that there may have been some dissatisfied customers who saw GSA reps wearing targets and got the wrong idea. So far no casualties were reported.

Nixon and the King

You can download the infamous photo of former President Nixon shaking hands with stoned-looking Elvis Presley who met with the president in 1970 to enlist in the country's war on drugs.

The National Archives and Records Administration last month posted the online exhibit "When Nixon Met Elvis " to mark the 20th anniversary of the death of the King of Rock `n' Roll. The exhibit includes an image of a letter in the King's own handwriting expressing his repugnance at "the drug culture" and "the hippie elements." Presley noted that these folks did not consider him an enemy positioning him as a perfect undercover agent in the war on drugs if only Nixon would unofficially designate him as "a federal agent at large." Experience the irony of it all at www.nara.gov/exhall/nixonelvis.

Department of Acronyms

The Defense Logistics Agency last week sent FCW a list of dozens of Defense Department logistics systems. The large number of these systems operating in DOD is incredible but we found ourselves much more fascinated by the acronyms.

Some acronyms reflected the military culture at the department: MEDALS (Military Engineering Data Asset Locator System) and WARRS (Wholesale and Retail Receiving/Shipping System). Others emphasized family values: DADS (Defense Automated Disposal System) and SIS (Shipping Information System).

Some were peaceful: FFAVORS (Fresh Fruit and Vegetables Ordering and Receipt System) and DAISY (Defense Reutilization and Marketing Automated Information System). Others were violent: SLAP (Source Librarian and Preprocessor) and DESEX (DOD Emergency Supply Expert System).

Still others we imagine would be impossible to pronounce without sounding silly: SAMSAM (Standard Augmented Mass Storage Access Methods) and DODAAD (Department of Defense Activity Address Directory).

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